It's Friday night at 10:30 pm. You just drank two tall glasses of something with vodka in it, and a beer. You have two small children, and when the sun comes up, I assure you, they will be there. And they will be ready to pounce. You have the Penguin game cued up on the DVR. They just played the Florida Panthers. Now, I ask you, what do you do? What DO YOU DO?
You fast forward through the game, that's what you f***ing do. At the highest possible speed. It's not a hard question.
Having only watched the Sullivan goal, that guy from Florida's goal, and Neal and Geno toying with Jose Theodore in the shootout, here's what we can tell you:
1) Evgeni Malkin has only one goal and 3 points in the last 5 games, and he was just held scoreless in back-to-back games for the first time since 2010. As you might imagine, James Neal has done next to nothing over the same stretch. One assist. That's it. And the Penguins just won their 8th game in a row.
|But we can never break up this line, right?|
3) This team is very, very good and very, very deep. And they're about to get a lot better and a lot deeper.
Read on after the jump for the truth about why Sid isn't coming back on Sunday, and, did you hear about Ovechkin?
- I can't remember precisely, and I might be misconstruing the 8 million tweets I just saw saying Sidney Crosby will not come back tomorrow, is shooting for Thursday, and has had no setbacks, but I have an inkling that Sidney Crosby will not play tomorrow, may play Thursday, and feels fine. This is all good news. The Sunday target always felt unnecessarily rushed to us. Sid goes symptom free for a week and he's suddenly back in the lineup? After taking like three gentle nudges from a stick-less Dustin Jeffrey in practice? That's sufficient prep for the stretch run? No, no it isn't. And that's why Sid will wait. Because he's not an idiot.
- But you know who is, if not an idiot, at least someone the Penguins have to be ecstatic about "missing out" on in the 2004 entry level draft? Yep. If you haven't read the Washington Post's stellar piece on Alex Ovechkin, you need to do that now. We almost feel bad for the guy. Everyone's critiquing him, he's got an overbearing mother, and John Stiegerwald assumes he took steroids. He could probably use someone to hold him and tell him it's not his fault.
Except it is his fault. When you're making $10 million a year and have a "C" on your chest, just take some responsibility and don't be such a d-bag about everything. Maybe find yourself a role model.