Friday, January 28, 2011

Morning Skate: Ron Cook's Comeback and The Big Legursky

By Artistry

Ron Cook is fighting to become relevant to GTOG Nation again. First, he comes up with a new rhetorical device known as the Clause Dedication and then, this morning, he breaks out a column about Steelers backup quarterback Charlie Batch that not only identifies the one storyline that absolutely no one is talking about this week - for good reason - but also launches an attention-grabbing assault on the English language. To get us warmed up, here is the Friday edition of Today in Ron Cook Poetry: "No Way, Right?"

There's just no way, right?
Or is there?
Let's give the man his due right now:
You might say history repeated itself.
Who saw that coming?
So Batch was.
Think about it:
"My body feels fresh," he said.
There's just no way, right?

Or is there?

I have goose bumps. Now, to the big story of the morning: nobody is kidding themselves about Maurkice Pouncey's chances of playing in the Super Bowl, except maybe Maurkice Pouncey. You know what that means. Way out west there was this fella... fella I wanna tell ya about. Fella by the name of Doug Legursky. At least that was the handle his loving parents gave him, but he never had much use for it himself. Mr. Legursky, he called himself "The Dude".

"Hey, cool it B.J. Raji. OK man? There's a beverage here."

No comments:

Post a Comment

Post a Comment